Back where we belong to:

Trees swishes past me, waving as the wind ruffles them. I put on my headphones and the music blares in my ears, stopping the noises of babies crying, men arguing over the rights and wrongs of certain ministers, women are either sleeping with their head over the edge of their seats, or trying to shush the babies. 

Songs by songs shuffles through, entertaining my ears, or more precisely my mind from drifting off to another land. As I go through my playlist, I see I haven’t added any new music to it in last 7-8 months. I smile at the uncertainty of it, I used to be crazy with music always craving for something new, something more. Things change without you even realising it.

There are barren lands, burned crop fields; there are corn fields, dancing, there are small orchards. People working in their fields, I see small kids jumping in several small pools of water, some swinging and laughing at the side.

There is a pause and I pick my phone up to check – 

” Baby, you don’t speak anything. You need to sleep, I’ll sing you to sleep. Okay?”

A slurry, drowsy voice fills in my ears, it’s a recorded call audio. The first time someone sang for me, so as to make me sleep. You were drunk, and hell sleepy. And I wanted to stop you so that you could sleep but I couldn’t. I was curious. The edges of my lips turns up at the memory.

“Lag ja Gale ki fir ye haseen raat ho na ho, Shaayad Phir Is Janam Men Mulaaqaat Ho Na Ho. Lag Jaa Gale …”

You take a small break and your voice slurrs and breaks. You yawn but you continue..

“Ham Ko Mili Hain Aaj, Ye Ghadiyaan Nasib Se Ji Bhar Ke Dekh Lijiye Ham Ko Karib Se Phir Aap Ke Nasib Men Ye Baat Ho Na Ho Shaayad Phir Is Janam Men Mulaaqaat Ho Na Ho Lag Jaa Gale …

Paas Aaiye Ki Ham Nahin Aaenge Baar-Baar Baahen Gale Men Daal Ke Ham Ro Le Zaar-Za..”

Your voice fades away and with that you went quite. I found myself listening your deep breaths, once again. For some unknown reason I still couldn’t delete that record yet. Everytime I listen to it, it hurts and makes me smile. Every now and then I wonder how you’ve ruined me with these little moments. I wonder, if I have ruined you too, even a miniature destruction would’ve lessened the ache. 

Song changes but my thoughts are stuck somewhere else. And just like that, we’re back where we belong to – in my memories.